The 28-year-old lawyer on this #NairaLife has over $150k in savings but put her financial happiness at 5/10. Why? Because the money is for her future, and she needs money for now.

Tell me about your earliest memory of money

My two siblings and I needed money to buy a cake for our mum’s birthday. Our dad had travelled, so we couldn’t ask him for money. We tried to find out how much big cakes cost, and knew we couldn’t afford it even if we saved our daily ₦100 pocket money for months, so we got creative. 

We bought one small cupcake each for ₦100, and before she got home from work, decorated them with everything we could find in the fridge — chocolate syrup, candy, everything.

Aww. How did she react?

She didn’t eat the cakes, but she was grateful. When we talk about it now, she mentions how emotional she was because it was a financially difficult time for the family. 

How?

Me o, I can’t remember any difficulty, but apparently, we were managing. 

We grew up eating a lot of dried catfish and thought she gave us because we liked it. Nope. It’s because it was the cheapest fish she could find. Even the ₦100 she gave us to school was just because she didn’t want us to feel left out when other children were buying stuff — even though we got food packed. The fancy soups I thought she made were attempts at throwing whatever she could find into a pot and giving us what came out. Even the pizza we ate was homemade because we couldn’t afford to buy. But again, I can’t remember life being difficult one bit. I enjoyed my childhood. My mum is always thanking God we don’t remember. 

What did your parents do? 

My dad did cocoa importing and exporting, and my mum was a lawyer — and I wanted to be just like her. Apart from being a mummy’s girl, a few incidents also made me develop a strong sense of justice. 

Do you remember them?

We had a driver that just stopped showing up. My parents thought he’d quit until weeks after we stopped seeing him, his wife called us crying that she also hadn’t seen him. My parents somehow found him at a police station, detained for nothing. My mum helped get him out. Another time, a police officer stopped my mum’s colleague’s son and after pocketing his driver’s license, claimed he was driving without a license. He was also detained, and had to beg someone that came into the station to help call his mother. Again, my mum helped him out. 

So you studied law

Nope. Economics and Business Administration. I went to the US for school, and you can’t study law as your first degree. I was really good at math and loved economics in secondary school, so I thought this was a good first degree. 

Things had gotten better for your family financially

Yes, but my parents still couldn’t afford to pay full tuition for three children. We got scholarships and they made us promise to keep the good grades so the scholarships would continue. We all did. I even graduated summa cum laude. 

I also didn’t collect pocket money from my parents. I found jobs on campus that paid me $400 a week, so I could afford to fuel my car, feed myself and pay my speeding tickets, but no more. For example, I couldn’t afford the school’s annual ball because I couldn’t afford a dress. 

Wait…Speeding tickets?

I got them all the time. I don’t know where I was always rushing to. 

Vin Diesel, please

LMAO. 

What happened after?

I graduated from university in 2015 and then went to law school between then and 2018.

I worked at law school too and even though I made less money than when I was in university, my parents still didn’t have to bother about giving me money for sustenance. After law school, I got a corporate law job at a firm. 

Not criminal law?

I’d found out I could tie law and economics with things like antitrust law, tax law and project financing law, and I didn’t want to give up my love for numbers. So I went that route. 

How did that go?

Great! My job paid $180k for the year I was there. I lived with a family member and didn’t have to pay rent or utilities, and I’ve never been a big spender, so by the time I was leaving, I had about $100k in savings. I did have to pay about $2k in speeding tickets that year though. 

LMAO. Why were you there for only a year?

I didn’t have a work authorisation to stay in the US for more than a year after graduation. I was already thinking of planning a fake wedding with a friend for a green card, but God told me not to do it. So I returned to Nigeria in 2019 and went for NYSC. 

What did that feel like?

I knew my family was comfortable, so I wouldn’t suffer. But I also knew I’d have to start all over. I even did law school again after NYSC. 

But at least, you had $100k 

$100k that I didn’t touch. Even until now, I’ve barely touched it. I’ve just kept it as emergency funds. I started NYSC as a regular corp member, collecting allawee and pocket money from my parents. Then my PPA, a federal law parastatal, paid me ₦92k per month.

What could ₦92k get you?

Data, fuel, and some food. From the first month, I knew it wasn’t going to be enough if I wanted to do any other thing like go out and buy stuff. So my mum gave me ₦300k “pocket money” the next month. After that month, I started touching my savings small small. I realised I didn’t want to do that, so I started doing side gigs.

What kind?

I reached out to people I’d schooled and worked with in the US and asked for quick jobs like writing business plans, growth strategy, market and product expansion plans, contract writing and reviewing, and negotiations. I was getting an average of $2,200 on months when I got jobs. Some months could go up to $5,300. 

Fundsss

I had to stop when it was time for law school in January 2022 because law school students in Nigeria aren’t allowed to work. Thankfully, I’ve never been a big spender, so I had savings to fall back on. And when I finished law school in September, I started again. 

I’m curious about how much you have in savings

I have three savings buckets. The $90-something-k savings is for life-or-death situations for me or my family members. It’s absolutely untouchable except for health or maybe life-threatening situations. I try not to remember I have it. 

From my side gigs from the past few years, I have two savings buckets. One has €40k in it. It’s for my future studies. I want to get an MBA. The other has about $25k in it. It’s my regular savings account. Apart from my entire year of NYSC allawee that I still haven’t touched, I don’t have any naira savings. 

Where did you learn about saving?

From my mum. She’s always been averse to loans and stressed the importance of having rainy day funds. I’m also not a big spender on myself, so unless someone wants something, any extra goes into savings.

What are you up to these days?

I currently work in finance and economics consulting, but I’m applying for law-related jobs in Nigeria. I’m trying to build myself in both law and economics. My goal in life is to make enough money to become a venture capitalist — someone who finances businesses — and I want to understand every aspect of how businesses work. That’s also why I’m getting an MBA. 

Do you have a business of your own?

I’m starting one this year. It’s beauty-related.

Tell me something you want but can’t afford right now

A new car, an apartment and three international trips annually lol.

What can you afford?

Petrol, food, a gym membership, car maintenance, beauty regimen — hair, nails and skincare. 

And how do you break down your monthly expenses?

Final question: how financially happy are you? The scale is 1-10

5. I need more money. I want to be able to travel and do more for myself without having to touch any of my savings buckets.

After three years making millions as an influencer, the 23-year-old on this week’s Naira Life is following God’s plan and starting a career in music.

Tell me about your earliest memory of money

When my family moved from Lagos to Jos in 2008, I think. My mum sold books, food, and did stuff like printing and photocopying. My brother and I helped with food delivery . Not far delivery o. I was only 9. It was just stuff like, “Take this to Mr X’s shop across the street.” 

Do you remember why you moved to Jos?

My mum wanted to be on her own. My dad had left by the time I was born, so she lived in her family house with her two children. Moving to Jos was one of those independent moves for her.

How cold was Jos?

Cold. Very cold. Also peaceful, until the riots started in 2010. 

Ah. 

We started hearing gunshots and explosions from the estate where we lived. We had to move. 

Where did your mum go?

Lagos. We stayed there for a few months, then moved to Ilorin. 

Tell me about Ilorin

It wasn’t as cold as Jos, but it was calm and peaceful. But I always thought things around me weren’t developing. Whenever I went to Lagos for holidays with my mum’s family and came back. It was like I was returning to a rural place that had stayed the same for years.

Was there money at home?

We were surviving. Sometimes, it was good. Other times, it wasn’t. An uncle handled our school fees, and mumsi handled day-to-day stuff like feeding and transportation. We got ₦50 or so to take to school every day. We had to decide whether to use the money for food or transportation. If we chose food, we’d have to walk for hours.

To make extra money, my brother and I sold mangoes and lemons from the trees in our compound. For the lemon tree, a mallam that usually came and filled a huge sack gave us ₦900. Now that I think about it, he was cashing out on our heads. I majorly used the money to buy airtime to boost my 2go rankings. 

Did you ever reach master?

Nah. Professional.

What was uni like?

Chaotic. I can’t say I fully experienced it because I was drunk about 80% of the time, especially from my third year. I was just vibing through life. I made the most money in my life, so far, in uni though.

Tell me about it

I first waited at home for a year because federal universities weren’t taking 15-year-olds. That year, friends online introduced me to digital marketing, so I worked with people who were creating and promoting content. I was learning, but I got some money too. 

The next year, I got into university to study mass communication.

It started with me seeing a popular event producer on my university campus in 2015 and walking up to him. I introduced myself and told him I did social media and content creation, in case he had any gigs for me. Thankfully, he was setting up a gaming centre on campus and needed someone to help promote it to students and get people to show up. I took the job. 

How much did it pay?

₦30k monthly, and it came with a phone. I think the salary increased at some point. He also sent me social media management and content creation gigs here and there. 

On the side, my personal social media pages were growing into hundreds of thousands of followers because I was creating viral funny and creative content. Basically, I’d become an influencer. So brands were reaching out to me to promote them.

By the end of the first semester of my second year, I quit the on-campus job because I wanted to focus on my personal brand. 

How much were you making from these brand deals?

I wasn’t tracking, but I was doing at least ₦100k per month. 

Where was all this money going?

Flexing, drinking, feeding. Zero savings. I occasionally sent money home, but in retrospect, I should have sent way more. I even bought a car for ₦850k in my third year. 

Ballest

I also started two businesses. One was t-shirt retailing. I bought shirts and resold them. The other was personalised merch. I threw funny captions on stuff and sold them. I didn’t have any problems selling them because I had an audience. But I also wasn’t so serious.

Why?

Whenever I sold a batch and made plenty money, I stopped until I needed money again. And when I was leaving uni in late 2019, I stopped the businesses altogether. I had a different plan for my life. 

What was that?

Acting. I got a small role in a stage play in November 2019 that paid ₦200k, and thought, “This is good. I want to enter this industry.” So I began to plan my own stage play. I wrote a script with a few friends. By February 2020, I had 40 people show up for my stage play. It was great. After paying everyone that worked on it, I made about ₦50k. Then lockdown happened, so no more stage plays.

2020 was a big year for me because Jesus found me. I grew up in a Christian home but didn’t really take my spirituality seriously until I woke up on the day after my stage play and had a sudden distaste for living in sin, then began to seek God. I also started a Bible Study group online, started creating Christian content, and these activities challenged me to study and pray more. 

Sweet

Before the lockdown, my brother and I partnered to create a website that delivered food. Just think of something like Jumia Food. He built the website, I did the promotion. 

How did that make you money? 

We made ₦100 on each food pack sold through the app. We split it 50-50. We only did it for three months, but we made about ₦1.3m in revenue. 

My uncle gave me ₦300k when NYSC posted me. His plan was for me to leave the northern state after camp and redeploy somewhere, maybe Jos, even if I didn’t want to return to Lagos. He was willing to pay my rent too and fly me abroad to start my life after NYSC. But on the last day of camp, I was just sure God wanted me to stay, so I sent him a long text and he replied “Okay”. 

We’ve hardly spoken since then.

What was your year in the north like?

Wonderful. I was completely away from friends, social media, noise, and everything. I read a lot of self-help books, and grew spiritually, emotionally and all round, mentally. It was like I took a year off to understand God’s will for my life. 

Sounds great. How were you surviving?

Before I moved to the north, I sold my car for ₦350k and added ₦150k from what my uncle gave me to put in a forex trading company. I got ₦65k monthly for like two months, and then the thing crashed, and I couldn’t do anything about it.

I survived mainly on NYSC’s ₦33k and my PPA’s ₦12k until September, when I got a remote digital strategist gig that paid ₦50k monthly. 

Did you stay in the north after NYSC?

I wanted to. But God said I should return to Lagos to make music. That’s what he wants me to do. 

Gospel music?

Nah. Great secular music that’s not about fraud, sex and drugs. 

What was your plan to execute this?

To return to Lagos, make music and use my social media influence to blow in like two weeks. I didn’t realise I needed to put in work, learn, grow and go through a process.

How did it go?

I wrote, recorded and released a few songs, realised I was broke, got a ₦120k/month content job in April, used the money to buy some equipment, and made some more music. 

I also brought back the retail clothing business. I’m not making as much sales as I used to when I was in university, but I’m still putting things in place. 

Have you made money from music in the past year?

Maybe like $5 from Spotify. 

Let’s go and paint the town red

LOL! But I did get ₦5m from a family member for my music. 

I’m listening

I received ₦2.5m in November to buy more equipment and do artist development — vocal training, performance training, and to make more music. After six months, I’ll receive the other half to promote and market my music. 

All for free?

I offered him 7% of all my streaming revenue for whatever music I make in the next 10 years. It’s a great deal. 

What are your finances like right now?

I have like ₦50k saved and like ₦700k in mutual funds and shares. 

Is there something you want but can’t afford?

A power bike. There’s traffic in Lagos. Plus, I’m a cool kid, so why not?

How do you break down your monthly expenses?

How financially content are you? The scale is 1-10

3. I’m aiming for a lot more because I know I need money to achieve my goals as a musician. I need to be making like ₦200k in profit from my clothing business and another ₦800k from somewhere else. 

The 23-year-old student on this week’s Naira Life started his first business in 2020. Since then, he’s tried and failed at five businesses. He doesn’t know what it is, but something keeps pushing him to try again, even though he’s now in ₦2m debt. 

What’s your earliest memory of money?

2006. I was seven and my mum sent me to buy something for her. I can’t remember how much it was or what I was to buy, but I lost the money and got the beating of my life. That day, I decided I’d always have extra cash so I wouldn’t be in trouble if I lost someone’s money again. 

Where did you plan to get extra cash?

I don’t know o. I just didn’t like the beating. But I’ve lost money plenty of times since then. I still lose money. And most times, I don’t have the extra cash to replace it. So I got beaten a few more times. 

Was there money at home?

We were okay. We went to Mr. Biggs almost every weekend. My parents were civil servants who worked with the Federal Road Safety Corps, and my siblings and I went to the best schools wherever we lived — whether it was Lagos, Jos, Kaduna, Abuja or Benue.

Why were you moving up and down?

The government kept transferring my dad.

How did moving around affect you?

I don’t know how to speak my native language. Also, it caused delays that meant I had to finish secondary school at 18.

Did university happen immediately?

Almost immediately, yes. 

What did you study?

Crop production. 

Was that your choice, or what they gave you?

100 per cent my choice. I didn’t want to be a doctor, engineer or lawyer. I don’t like stress, so I didn’t want a career that would make me think too much. I also hate competition, and I imagined those fields are competitive. When I saw crop production in the list of courses on the JAMB portal, I thought, “This looks great. I even like agriculture.”

What did your parents think?

They loved it. They thought I was thinking differently from people my age. They didn’t know I just didn’t want stress in my life. 

How did uni go?

You mean how is uni going? I’m in my final year. There have been strikes here and there, and COVID too. But I’m enjoying my course and can’t wait to be a farmer. Right now, I’m doing business on the side. 

When did you start your business?

During lockdown in 2020. I was stuck at home with my parents, and it was the most frustrating period of my life. They had a problem with everything I did. Even if I breathed, wahala. I just thought to myself, “If I want to survive this period, I have to get something doing”. I didn’t want to work for someone because I had bad experiences, so I started selling perfume. 

Wait… what bad experiences?

In 2017, right after secondary school, I worked at a cyber cafe, helping people type and register for stuff, for two months. The owner paid me ₦7k monthly even though I made ₦7k daily for him.

That’s how things are in Benue. People aren’t paid well. I know people with university degrees earning ₦80k while SSCE holders earn like ₦20k. 

When I said I was leaving, he offered to increase my salary to ₦15k, but I’d already made up my mind to leave, so I went to stay with my aunt in Abuja until uni resumed in early 2018.

There was a strike during my first semester, so I had to return home to find work. I worked at a provisions shop for three weeks and left because the owner and his wife were always insulting and fighting everyone, even customers. Out of the ₦12k they were meant to pay me, they paid ₦8k. Thankfully, the strike didn’t last long. 

So when COVID came, I thought, “What can I do for myself?”

How did you decide on perfumes?

A friend from my choir group sold perfumes. He told me he bought the oils for ₦2,500 and sold them for ₦5k — sometimes, ₦6k. When the lockdown was partially lifted, I bought some perfumes and posted them on my status. Whenever I went out, I had them in my bag.

Also, I was doing Virtual Top Ups (VTU).

Wetin be that?

I paid ₦10k to sign up to a website where I got data for cheap and sold to people for cheaper than they’d normally buy. For example, I got 1 GB for ₦220 and sold at ₦350.

Both businesses were bringing in an average total of ₦20k profit monthly for a few months until my other friends started selling perfumes and business became slow. So I switched to shoes.

How?

A friend who makes shoes told me to help him publicise his business on my social media and I’d make money from it. I first brought ten people to him, but my pay was a pair of shoes because he didn’t have money. Then I found another 20 people. After I introduced the first few to him and he messed up on timelines and quality, I started getting shoes from another friend who made them in Jos. This one sent the shoes to me, I sold them and kept the markup. I was making about ₦1,500 per shoe. 

This continued until I started another business in September 2020.

Dangote, please

A friend was doing POS, and it was bringing him money, so I thought, “Why not?” 

I needed ₦150k to start, and I had ₦20k. So I sold my laptop for ₦80k and got ₦50k from my aunt. After building a small shop made of wood and a zinc roof, and getting the POS machine, I still had ₦70k left. 

On the first day, a guy came, transferred ₦2k and collected ₦20k. I don’t believe in jazz o, but I don’t know how he did it. I know I saw a ₦20k alert. 

What did you do?

I just laughed with my friends and moved on. 

How do people that do POS business make money?

To use my POS to collect ₦1k, I charge ₦100. ₦25 goes to the POS company, and I keep ₦75. The higher the withdrawal, the higher the charges, and the higher the company’s commissions.

For how long did you do the POS thing?

Six months. I had to go back to school in late 2020, so I left the business with friends. The first person “lost” ₦100k in her first month. I can’t say she stole it because she’s a friend’s friend and she shouldn’t do something like that. The second person “lost” ₦60k in one month. By March, I just told them to stop.

How much did you make from the business in total?

I don’t know. I wasn’t keeping any books. I was even saving to set up shop in school but that didn’t work out because I didn’t have money. So I just stayed in school until I saw an opportunity to start another business. 

I’m not even surprised

I was on my bank app when I saw that because money had been entering my account frequently over the past year, I could take a ₦750k loan. I took it. 

What was the plan?

I used ₦350k to buy a plot of land for farming. The remaining ₦400k, I used to set up a cyber cafe on campus and continue my POS business. 

How did that go?

In the first month, the photocopier I bought for ₦80k spoilt. I fixed it and continued to do business. I was making like ₦70k profit a month and balling. I was sponsoring friends’ birthday parties and doing zero savings. Big mistake, of course. I should’ve been investing in another business. And it came back and blew in my face. 

How?

Remember the ₦750k loan, I was paying back ₦2k every day. Towards the end of the year, the school went on an internal strike. There were no students to patronise me, so I became broke again. They called off the strike during the festive period, so nobody resumed. Then, there was ASUU strike from early February till the end of 2022. Throughout that period, I stayed with my aunt in Abuja and worked as a primary school teacher, earning ₦45k.

How were you paying off your loan?

I wasn’t. They called and called until they were tired. I’d paid ₦100k before I stopped, but they said I now owe over ₦2m because my debt has grown by 200% interest. When I have money, I’ll reach out to them, and we’ll negotiate something. 

You’re killing me. What do you do now?

My friend and I have a restaurant on campus.

Sir?

He cooks, and we have two employees who help to cook and sell. I go to the market to buy goods and do most of the administration. 

What happened to the cyber cafe?

By the time I returned after the ASUU strike, the machines were rusty and would’ve cost a lot to repair. So I’ve left that one. 

I don’t know what it is, but even though I’m failing at these businesses, I just want to keep trying my hands at different things. 

How much do you make on an average month?

Like ₦120k. ₦60k from the restaurant and ₦60k from helping people write their research papers. I charge ₦15k per person, and I help about four people in a month. 

How do you break that down in a month?

Tell me something you want but can’t currently afford

A car. I want to start doing Uber or Bolt. I also want to move out of my parents’ house. And I want to start my farm. I’ve not touched that land I bought. 

On a scale of 1-10, what’s your financial happiness?

Minus 10. I’m in debt. 

Because she could draw, this week’s #NairaLife subject’s parents thought architecture would be a great fit for her.
In university, she joined the press and media team and, from there, launched her editor career. Now, she’s a musician, looking to start her fashion line. 

When was the first time you saw money?

A cousin who owned a bookstore and knew I loved reading gave me a carton of novels to sell to my friends at school in SS 1. I sold two after reading all the books. And from those two, I got maybe ₦500 per book. That was the first time I ever owned money. 

SS 1?

Yes. I had no need to own money before then. There was food at home and in school, and a driver dropped me off and picked me up. My parents were very frugal too. They spent on only what was necessary. Like clothes, but only enough clothes, and nothing extra. What else does a 12-year-old need money for?

Why were you 12 in SS 1?

I was getting perfect scores in every subjects so my primary school made me skip classes until I began to get normal scores. I started secondary school at eight. 

Scholarstic

Das meee. I waited a year at home after secondary school because I was too young to go to uni, and in 2011 when I turned 16 I was admitted to study architecture. 

Why architecture?

As a child, I did a lot of reading, writing, singing and drawing. Towards the end of secondary school, I thought I was going to be a big fashion brand in the future because I was always drawing fashion sketches. My parents noticed this and decided architecture was a great fit. 

Don’t kill me. What did you actually want?

No idea. I didn’t know what I wanted. My parents even wanted me to study medicine at first, just because I was smart. Thankfully, UNILAG didn’t accept students below 16 at the time. I eventually went to a private university.

So how was architecture?

I hated it. I was lost and confused in my first year. I didn’t know what I was doing there. It’s like I had this creative energy and didn’t know where to channel it. At some point, I had a panic attack. At another point, I joined a theatre group. I was just looking for something to do.

I experimented a lot more in my second year until I found what worked for me. First, I tried to join the school choir, then I joined an entrepreneurial class, but they were not serious. 

Finally, I joined the press and media unit, and for the first time, I found something I liked. I was one of the very few non-mass comm students there, but I didn’t mind. I had to submit a written entry before I was accepted, and immediately, they thought I was great. From then, press and media became my thing. At the press unit, I was getting better at writing and getting heavily involved with administration. 

By my third year, I was head of the editorial department, and by my final year, I became the first-ever non-mass comm press secretary of the student council. 

Mad. What about school?

I was just drifting through architecture. I faked illnesses so I could miss classes to sleep and watch movies. I knew how to pass exams, so I wasn’t failing out of school. But my lack of interest was so obvious, a lecturer called me aside during my final year studio defence and asked me if I really wanted a career in architecture. Once I told her no, she passed me. I graduated in 2015 with a 2:1. 

What happened after uni? 

NYSC. The fun part of youth service was that I had the freedom to volunteer for things I was interested in. I wrote drama scripts and acted in plays for an organisation raising awareness for homeless children. That one paid me ₦15k monthly. I also volunteered for WHO as an independent monitor for immunisation campaigns and got ₦6k every weekend I worked. 

What did you spend your money on?

French lessons because I wanted to learn a new language, and vocal training because I wanted to become a musician. 

Bonjour le masi

Please. I finished NYSC in 2016 and spent the next seven months at home creating music content on social media to see if my music career would take off from there. 

Should Asake be worried?

Lmao, no, not yet. By May 2017, my dad got me an editorial assistant job at a comms agency. They paid ₦70k, and I was there until November when a mentor I met through my cousin reached out to ask if I wanted an editorial trainee role with a publishing company. After two meetings with the CEO, they hired me. 

How much did they pay?

₦100k. 

What was your plan?

I started out as an editorial trainee, but they threw me into two big projects in the first two months, and once they saw I was good at editing and managing clients, they promoted me to editor. No raises though. After two years, I got a raise to ₦150k, and in addition to my primary responsibilities, I also oversaw company events. Then I got promoted to senior editor and another raise to ₦220k. 

All this while, I was making music small small and performing at shows for free. 

It’s giving growth

LMAO. By mid 2020, almost the entire editorial team had left because the CEO insisted we all came to work immediately after the lockdown, and people weren’t having it. I was also going to leave, but she begged me to stay and offered me the managing editor position with a raise to ₦300k. I took it even though I didn’t want to. 

Why?

I had a weird relationship with the CEO. She liked me, but she was not a great boss. Working there was toxic. She was too emotionally attached to the job, and it affected the decisions she made and the way she interacted with us. There was office politics too, and my coworkers weren’t the nicest people. My dad had told me to leave, but the promotion made me stay. 

Why did you eventually leave?

I was poached by a media company that saw my LinkedIn. They hired me as a senior editor. It was a demotion from the role I was coming from, but it was more money and, more importantly, freedom from the other job. 

How much?

₦350k. 

And the working environment?

Much better. Less toxic. It’s a bigger team, but the people are much nicer. And there’s less pressure on me. I had a better work-life balance at the other job, but I can still take on side gigs here. 

What side gigs?

I have a contract as an editorial consultant with another publishing company trying to set up. I’m helping them build their structure and network. They pay me ₦200k monthly. I also freelance. I help self-publishing authors edit their books and write statements of purpose, scholarship essays and optimise LinkedIn pages for people trying to japa, and whatever other editorial freelancing jobs I get. Apart from the ₦550k I get from my two stable sources of income monthly, I make between ₦200k and ₦500k extra from freelancing. Sometimes, more. 

What does that look like for your finances?

This is what I have right now: 

And how do you break down your monthly spendings?

I’m curious about your plans for your career

I’m saving up for two things. First, I want to invest in my music. I want to pay for artist development. I don’t want to be one of those musicians who just wings it. I want to learn how to perform and promote my music. I also want to record a full-length album. This should cost me around ₦8.5m. 

Then I want to start a lifestyle brand that retails jewellery, makeup, household items and clothing. I’m already talking to manufacturers in China. I’ll also need money for promotion and marketing. I’m projecting I’ll need between ₦5 and ₦10m to get started. 

What do you want right now but can’t afford?

A home studio.

Tell me how financially happy you are on a scale of 1-10

5. Right now, I can afford the basics like food, shelter and clothing, but not the big projects I have planned.

Me, I don’t like group trips because they seem unnecessary. Why can’t we have fun at someone’s house? If you’re like me, this is how to get your friends to shout, “God forbid!” whenever your name comes up for the next trip to Lakowe Lakes. 

Don’t reply on time on the group chat

Air everyone. They’ll leave you next time. 

Start a “no talking” rule for the duration of the trip

And if someone talks, use Oraimo cord to wipe their neck. 

Start a rumour about the trip

Say it’s actually a secret cult initiation. The spicier the gist, the better. You can even tweet it on your burner. 

Pack your bags and leave without telling anyone

This is even better if the trip was your idea. 

Pretend to be a travel blogger

Spend the entire trip saying stuff like, “Hi guys. Welcome back to my YouTube channel!”

Sleep with a group member’s partner right before the trip

There must be drama. There MUST be drama. 

Pack smelly food for the trip

Fufu? Yes. Unwashed shrimp? Absolutely. 

If you want to ensure nobody invites you to meetings anymore, do these things. 

Note: You might get fired. But at least, you won’t have meetings when you’re unemployed, so win-win. 

Interrupt and talk over others

Don’t let anyone complete a sentence without butting in to say something off-topic. Once you do this five times in 30-minute meetings for one month straight, nobody will invite you to meetings again. This one is tried and tested.

Unmute your mic and share nasty office gist in the background

Don’t forget to shout, “Oh my God. I was unmuted?” after someone brings to your attention that you’ve just told the entire team the CEO has been sleeping with interns. 

Use porn as your video background

If it’s an online meeting, and they insist everyone has to put their videos on, just use porn as your video background and say you don’t know how to change it. Nobody is inviting you to meeting again. 

Make up words and use them repeatedly

When they eventually ask you the meaning of the word, insist that it’s industrial jargon. The fact that they don’t know it means they’re not up to date on industry standards.

Eat noisily during the meeting

If it’s an in-person meeting, fufu and efo riro is perfect. If it’s a video call, messily eat shawarma. But whatever you eat, eat loudly. 

Bring a pet and treat it as a “co-worker” participating in the meeting

When you’re done speaking, look to your dog and say, “So Jack, anything for us?” Then laugh for like one minute straight. Nobody will call you to a meeting again, walahi. 

Randomly share personal information

When it’s your turn to speak about your weekend, go into detail about how it was a bad weekend because you couldn’t last more than three minutes in bed even though your therapist said you should think about your dead grandma while having sex. That’ll be a great way to start the meeting. 

Use a voice changer

Imagine you’re at your appraisal and you sound like one of the chipmunks from Alvin and the Chipmunks. Sounds fun, no?

Share your screen and open a video that’s loud and inappropriate

May we suggest sites where you can find these?

Speak in a poorly-done accent throughout the meeting

How’s your Russian accent? Work calls are a great time to practice. 

Put your camera on then leave the room

Let your coworkers speak to a chair. 

So as a man, don’t be pressured to do any of these things this year. Put yourself first. 

Do transfer

Don’t do it. No matter how touching the story is or persuasive the requests are, don’t give anyone money. Put yourself first. Buy a PS5. Buy a car. Let everyone find their square root. 

Make money

The pressure on Nigerian men to make money has gone out of control. This year, show that your value isn’t tied to your bank account. Quit your job. End your business. Be useless. If the people around you don’t love you at your worst, then you can see the problem. 

Work out

First of all, working out is fatphobic. What if you’re not fit? Are you less of a man? All men should come together and decide not to work out this year. Who will beat us?

Fall in love

As a man, why are you showing emotions and staying up by 2 a.m. to talk to someone? Please, sleep. 

Be faithful

Let’s not lie. Men are not destined to be monogamous or bound by the rules of a relationship. This is the year to wake up. Spread your seed. 

Be a responsible father

How would children learn to hustle if you’re there providing everything for them? How would they know the world is wicked if you’re kind to them? Do better, king.

Be well-groomed

“Ohhh… men should have clean nails.” 

“Ohhh… men should use deodorant.”

Says who? SAYS WHO?

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Between 2010 and 2013, the 30-year-old on this #NairaLife missed two opportunities to fulfil his dream of working at a Big Four consulting firm, but he didn’t back down.

Now, he’s a manager at his dream job in the UK and thinks it might be time to move on.

Let’s start with your earliest memory of money

I was in nursery three when I first got sent out of school for owing fees. I was five and I remember seeing my dad cry and promise nothing like that would ever happen to his children again. 

You have memories from when you were five?

I even remember correcting people’s grammar at that age. I was one of those gifted children who developed fast and excelled in school. I had a double promotion between nursery one and three, and after primary four, I went straight to JSS 1. 

Okay o, efiko. Was nursery three the last time you were sent out of school?

Yeah. My dad got an okada and rider to take me to school in the mornings and pick me in the afternoons. The rider used the rest of the day to make money, so I was able to stay in school. 

What did your parents do for a living?

They were both civil servants. My mum worked in the ministry of education, so she started as a teacher and moved up the ladder until she retired as a vice principal. My dad worked in the ministry of finance. 

My mum was the major breadwinner. She sold pure water and drinks on the side, and I used to help her sell after school. It was through her job we had housing because the government gave her a place to stay whenever they transferred her to a new school. 

I’m curious about what it’s like moving from primary four to JSS 1

I was taken to a boarding school in a different part of the state, but I spent a major part of the first year at home because every time I returned to school, I’d get really homesick again, and my parents would have to pick me up. This was the year 2001, so I was only nine years old. After the session, I came out top of the class of almost a thousand students. My dad told them to check again because I was hardly in school and I’d missed tests and exams. When they confirmed I was top of the class, he just took me away. I remember him saying he didn’t want me to be a “big fish in a small pond”. 

He took me to a new school to start JSS 1 again. It was a boarding house, still far from home because it was in a different state, but I wasn’t as homesick anymore. Here, there were no positions. Everyone just got their grades. I stayed there from JSS 1 to 3 before he brought me back home to attend a more expensive day school because I was “becoming lean”. I knew he just missed me. 

By JSS 3, things were getting good for my dad at his workplace. In fact, after JSS 3, I returned home to our first rented apartment. It’s not like we didn’t still have my mum’s government-issued housing o. My dad just thought since he was getting promotions and now had money, he wanted to live in his own house. We stayed there for three years before we moved to his own government-issued house. 

Where did you grow up?

Rivers state. We moved around a lot, but I spent a lot of time in Port Harcourt. 

What was that like?

It was chill. It didn’t have the Lagos chaos. But the downside was I wasn’t exposed. I didn’t have much to look up to. My goal in life would have been to be a civil servant like my parents, or maybe work in oil since that’s a big deal in Rivers. 

How did this affect your choice of what to study in university?

It didn’t really. I wanted to study economics because I was good at it in secondary school, but my older sister advised against it because there were “too many economists in Nigeria”. She directed me to computer science, and that’s what I studied. I went to a private university. 

Fundsss

It was my dad’s idea. I’d gone to public school all my life. He wanted me to experience something better since he could afford it. My fees were over ₦1.5m a year. I wouldn’t say he could pay it without struggling, but he could definitely afford it. 

How were your own finances?

I lived on the ₦40k I got from my dad every semester. If I needed more, I could always ask him, but I barely needed more. School provided all our meals, so the money was to buy anything extra. 

Did uni give you clarity on what you wanted to do with your life?

Yep. In my third year in 2010, I applied for an internship at a Big Four consulting firm and got it. But because it was in Lagos, and I didn’t have family to stay with, my dad didn’t let me take it. I eventually did my internship in Rivers State. 

When I resumed, I asked one of my lecturers what I could do to make money. He suggested ethical hacking, but it seemed complex. Then he suggested coding, but that also seemed stressful. Finally, he suggested IT auditing and said it was a field many people didn’t go into but paid well. I could get trained by a consulting firm, and I’d make money. So I decided I would get another opportunity to work at a Big Four. 

Did you?

After graduating in 2012 and finishing NYSC in 2013, I applied for the graduate training program of another Big Four. This time, my mum sponsored me to fly to Lagos twice for the different test stages. I did’t have money to go for the final interview, so I let it go. After that, I got a job in Port Harcourt as an IT admin officer, earning ₦100k. I stayed there for about 15 months before I got another opportunity to work at the same Big Four. 

This time, I had my own money because I’d been saving most of my salary. When I did my first two trips to take tests, my dad didn’t have an issue. But when he heard I was going for the final interview stage, he refused to let me go. To him, it meant I’d move out completely, and he just didn’t want it. 

So you lost the job again?

I actually went for the interview. On my way to the airport, my dad’s lawyer called and told me my dad had removed me from his will because I defied him. 

Ah

When the job offer came, I travelled to Lagos again to pick up the offer letter. It was when I got the Lagos I heard it could’ve been mailed to me if I’d just asked. 

LMAO. How much were flight tickets?

This was 2015, so they were about ₦25k for one-way trips. 

When I showed my dad the letter, he asked if they could allow me work from Port Harcourt. I said no. So he said I could go, but he wouldn’t support me financially. I left, stayed with a friend for three months then moved to my own ₦300k-yearly apartment. I stayed there from 2015 to 2022, and the rent never increased.

How much did the job pay?

₦140k monthly. At the training stage, they put us in units; I was placed in the auditing unit. At Big Fours, they do promotions or salary increases every year. So I moved from graduate trainee on ₦140k in 2015 to associate trainee on ₦180k in 2016 to associate two on ₦242k in 2017. 

What was all this money doing for you?

I was just establishing myself as a young professional in Lagos. Surviving, dressing and feeding better, buying a car, nothing spectacular. 

As a senior associate in 2018, my salary went to ₦350k. Then in 2020, I became an assistant manager and earned ₦465k. I became a manager in 2021, and my salary jumped to ₦790k. The next level is senior manager, but that’s after three years of being a manager. 

I resigned in 2022, and almost immediately after I sent in my resignation letter, they increased my role’s salary to ₦1m. 

Why did you resign? 

Japa. I got a job — same manager role — at another Big Four in the UK, and moved with my wife. 

Your wife?

I got married just before I left in 2022. 

How much did you spend on your wedding?

The entire wedding cost about ₦7m, but I only spent about ₦1.5 because I was broke. Between 2020 and 2022, I’d spent all my savings, and even borrowed money, on my dad’s health, surgery and eventual funeral. I spent about ₦6.5m on the surgery and another ₦2m for the funeral. 

After he died, I just felt like it was time to get married. Thankfully, our family contributed and my friends loaned me money without pressuring me to return it. I haven’t even returned all of it till now. 

How much does this job pay?

About £2,800 a month after taxes. For the low-cost city where I live, it’s decent. 

How do you spend money in a month?

My wife and I split our expenses. She earns a similar figure, so this is how we break it down:

We split the £100 we spend on transportation. 

What’s next for your career?

There’s a chance I’ll get a promotion to senior manager in 2024. Let’s see how that goes. Or maybe I’ll finally leave the Big Four life and get a different job. Who knows? 

Is there something you want right now but can’t afford?

A house with a mortgage. My wife and I work, so we should be able to afford a deposit in about two years. 

Where would you put your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?

6. We’re doing okay. We just moved to the UK. We’re still settling in and paying some of our debts, but I think we’re good. 2023 will be a great year. 

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