How long have you been with your partner?

I’ve been married to my husband for 10 years, and we’ve been together for 12.

How did you both meet?

Funny story. Akin was in a relationship with one of my old classmates, and we met when he accompanied her to my school’s alumni reunion in 2012. The lady abandoned him to flirt with another former classmate, so Akin angrily left. The whole drama played out in front of almost everyone at the reunion, and I remember feeling so embarrassed for him.

A few days later, I saw his Facebook profile and impulsively sent a friend request. He accepted almost immediately and sent me a message. He remembered me from the reunion, and we joked about how his babe left him for another guy. About three months after we started chatting, we met up, and love entered the picture. I moved in with him a month after we started dating.

So fast?

Akin was the first boyfriend I ever co-habited with, and I don’t even know where the confidence came from. My landlord had just increased my rent from ₦66k to ₦120k, and there was no way I’d pay that amount for a tiny face-me-I-face-you room. The initial plan was to find another apartment my ₦35k receptionist salary could afford, but househunting took a lot of time.

Akin didn’t want me to rush into getting an apartment that’d turn out worse, so he asked me to move in while I searched. I never thought I could co-habit with a lover because all you ever hear is that men take advantage of free bumbum and cooking. 

But I asked myself, “What’s the worst that could happen?” At 28 years old, I wasn’t a small girl. If I became uncomfortable with the situation, I could just leave. So, I stayed, and it turned out well. 

What was co-habiting like?

It was pretty smooth. Akin and I worked well together and shared everything from finances to chores. When I told my friends I paid for foodstuff and handled bills around the house, they thought I was stupid. Like what woman lives with a man who isn’t her husband and pays for things? But I didn’t see it as a big deal.

Did you both share the bills and expenses equally?

Not at all. It wasn’t like he asked me to bring money for anything — he worked in a bank and earned way more than me — we just liked to spend on each other. 

I could buy foodstuff on my way home from work, and he would do the same the next day. If NEPA bill met me at home, I would just pay it. That’s how we did it. Akin paid the rent, though.

When we got married in 2014, we still approached our finances the same way. That said, we’ve had to make several changes over the years.

What kind of changes?

Between 2014 and 2017, Akin was the sole provider. I had our children and couldn’t juggle motherhood with a job. 

However, he lost his bank job in 2017 and started a tiles business, which meant we were no longer sure of a specific amount coming in monthly. So, I looked for a job to support the family.

I got a teaching job with the federal government through a family friend, and my first salary was around ₦80k. Once I received my salary, I’d take ₦15k out for transport and sit down with Akin to plan how to spend the rest. On his own part, he sent his weekly profits to me to hide in a separate account for our rent. 

It probably sounds like we were so in sync, but we occasionally fought about money.

What were the fights about?

First, they were mostly due to financial pressure. I felt like I couldn’t even dictate how to spend my hard-earned money because he kept tabs on my salary. When I felt like that, I complained, and it almost always led to arguments.

Sometimes, Akin also kept profits to himself and would go weeks without giving me any money to keep. Whenever I noticed that, I complained, and he’d argue that he also wanted to hold money in his hands and spend without having to explain to me. 

At that point, I’d go, “Ehen? But you know exactly how much I earn and help me spend it right?”

So, yes, we fought about money a lot. But after the flare of emotions had died, we’d talk about it and understand it was normal for both of us to feel that way. It’s normal for us each to want to dictate how we spend our own money. But ultimately, we had to put family first and combine our resources for our children. When money fights happen now — which isn’t often — we try to remember that.

Glad it’s working out. What are your finances like these days?

Numbers-wise, we earn more, but I don’t think it shows in our standard of living. In a good month, Akin can make like ₦200k from his business. I now earn ₦128k, bringing our total average monthly income to ₦300k+, but we still struggle a lot.

Our house rent is ₦650k, and I save at least ₦50k monthly for that. The remaining ₦78k can’t feed my family for three weeks, and there are still small expenses like children’s clothes, medication and the rest. 

Akin still keeps money with me, but now we use that to handle school fees and major expenses. For example, we bought a washing machine for ₦180k in 2024. Everything else he makes goes into daily expenses like transportation, feeding, utility bills, fuel and sending money to our families.

Do you both have a relationship budget for dates and romance stuff?

Romance ke? Haha. We don’t o. Sometimes, my husband buys me suya when I disturb him about no longer putting effort into toasting me. We also take the children to cinemas and eateries during festive occasions. On my last birthday, he bought me a bag and a pair of shoes. I also bought him shoes for his birthday.

I don’t mind that we don’t always buy each other things or go out. I know how difficult things are, so it won’t be reasonable for me to ask. My husband is kind to me and helps me with everything. 

Before we got the washing machine, Akin did all the laundry by hand. He’s a good man, so I understand our situation. I don’t mind spending all my money to make our lives easier. That “the man must provide everything” story doesn’t apply in my home. 

What’s your ideal financial future as a couple?

My husband and I always talk about owning our home one day. If big money hits our hands, we’ll just erect a building of two or four flats so we can live in one flat and rent out the others for passive income. That would solve more than half of our problems.

Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.

*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.

NEXT READ: This Social Media Manager Wants Her Close-Fisted Boyfriend to Change or Risk Losing Her

What’s your earliest memory of money?

In JSS 3, I was a part-time apprentice learning how to make aluminium windows. Sometimes, clients would drop amounts like ₦1k for the apprentices to share. I can’t remember how much I usually got, but it was enough for snacks. That was the first time I got extra money — my family was quite poor —so it was a big deal.

Tell me more about your family’s financial situation

I grew up in the north, and everyone was pretty much content with what they had. I only realised we were poor when I became older. 

My dad was an okada rider, but when the state government banned okadas, he lost that income source. Then, he had a stint cleaning at a general hospital and farmed for food. 

My mum also did several things for money; she sold kerosene, firewood, uncooked pap and ground pepper for people with her grinding machine.

I’m the first child, and learning a trade while still in school was my parents’ way of making sure I had skills that could lead to money in the future. I didn’t just learn how to make windows; I also learnt photography and electrical installations. Those didn’t exactly bring money— except on the random occasions when clients dashed the apprentices’ money. I did get a chance to make money when I got into the polytechnic in 2017.

How did that happen?

So, at this point, I was living with my uncle. His son and I schooled in the same area, and I remember him giving us foodstuff and ₦500 each, then explaining that was all he had after saving for two weeks. It was very clear I needed to figure something out.

My mum sent me my first school fees — around ₦62k, but instead of paying my fees, I teamed up with my girlfriend and used the money to start a plantain chips business. We’d wake up at 4 a.m. to buy plantains at the market for insanely low prices, fry and pack in small plastic buckets, which we then gave to people to sell in school. 

We didn’t turn a profit at first, but I made my school fees back.

Phew. That could’ve turned out badly

That wasn’t the last time I used my school fees for business. We sold the chips for about a year and used my school fees as the capital for the most part. We stopped after a year when school authorities banned students from selling on the premises.

Around the same time, my landlady sent me and my guys packing, so I used everything I’d saved from the business to rent a new room. My guys never refunded me, and that’s how that money went. 

I finished my OND in 2019 with distinction and got a ₦50k cash gift from the state governor. I used the money to buy an Infinix phone someone eventually stole.

Yikes.

Anyway, my internship came next, and I secured an intern technician role at a company that sold inverters, batteries and other energy products. My salary was ₦15k/month, which mostly only covered transportation. 

Whatever was left went into financial self-help books. I think my financial situation really started to hit me, and I just wanted to learn everything I could about making money. I also started a liquid soap side hustle with the guys I lived with.

We made the soap in 5-litre kegs and sold each at ₦1k. We stopped when we ran out of customers. Then, we moved to coated peanuts. A friend’s sister sold zobo, so I went to her for used zobo bottles. We washed the bottles and used them for our peanuts. I can’t remember how much we sold the peanuts because sales weren’t consistent. We just shared whatever profit we made.

That’s how I managed my ₦15k salary. At some point, my employers increased it to ₦20k, but I didn’t enjoy that for long because my two-year internship ended three months later. 

Two years?

It was supposed to be one year, but I waited an extra year to return to school for my HND because of my girlfriend. Our school had some delays with the HND programme, and I didn’t want to leave her behind. Funny enough, she got a scholarship to study at a private university, and I returned to school alone.

But before I returned to school, my girlfriend and I decided to take the coated peanuts business seriously and make it a professional venture. We registered the business as a company and got NAFDAC approval in 2021. That was around the time Vice President Osinbajo offered a discount for people to register companies, and I spent less than ₦20k.

What was the NAFDAC approval process like?

Pretty seamless. I went to their office to get the requirements, and it took us about two months and about ₦100k from start to finish. That included the cost of fumigating the kitchen space we used for production and settling other requirements the NAFDAC officials gave as conditions for the inspection before finally getting the approval. We started selling before the approval came, though. 

My girlfriend took the peanuts to different banks on Fridays, and we also approached several supermarkets. We made the peanuts in 200 and 500 grams bottles and sold each at ₦1500 and ₦3k, respectively. Again, sales weren’t that consistent, and we put most of what we made back into the business. 

Marketing reduced when I resumed school. Since my girlfriend had transferred schools, I had to do it alone. So, in 2022, I dialled down on production and turned to writing for extra cash.

How did that go?

The money wasn’t great, but I survived. Although it was inconsistent, I charged ₦15k to write and print projects for students. Even when the gigs came, a project could take about three to six months to complete. 

Naturally, I was exploring other opportunities. A few friends in school had access to the SUG buses and used to get periodic solar installation gigs, so I tagged along since I had installation experience. The first time I went with them, we installed 12 panels in about four different places, and they paid me ₦45k. That was the biggest lump sum I’d ever received as personal income. I was so excited. 

Subsequent gigs paid ₦15k, but I absolutely loved it. I spent practically nothing on transportation and got fed whenever we went for gigs. It was like free money for only three hours of work. After a few months, I started getting the gigs myself and sharing the work with a friend. The first huge gig I got was in 2023, during NYSC. ₦1.3m for solar panel installations.

Mad o

That wasn’t only profit o. I still had to buy the panels and other materials. Even though I brought two friends on the project, I made ₦200k in profit. But that ₦1.3m was the biggest amount to ever enter my account. It was surreal.

Besides the occasional income from the solar installation gigs, I also got ₦53k/month from NYSC — ₦33k stipend and ₦20k from my Place of Primary Assignment (PPA). I served in the same polytechnic I graduated from, and I did everything from being a personal assistant to a lecturer to helping him teach classes within and outside the school. 

In addition, I got some side income helping students write project reports, which brought ₦30k on average. Plus, I received random ₦10ks here and there from students who were being supervised by the lecturer I worked with. The lecturer was super strict with projects, and some students gave me money to help with their projects or make sure they got approved. 

I made good money during my service year, and when it ended in October 2024, the money was pretty much used to set up my life. I got a ₦150k/year self-contained apartment and furnished the place with some furniture and other essentials. I even splurged ₦280k on a fridge and got a new laptop for ₦370k. In all, I spent about ₦1m.

What’s your income like post-NYSC?

I’m currently unemployed with no consistent income. Right now, I have only ₦900 in my account. Solar panel installation gigs don’t come as often anymore, and I can’t be sure of when or how much money will enter my account. The last gig I got was about a month ago, and it paid ₦220k. I used that to buy half a bag of rice and some other provisions because I might not get another gig for another month or two. 

I still run the coated peanut business, but I don’t earn from it. My girlfriend and I broke up in 2023, and I haven’t had much time to focus on growing the business. I have a manager who I pay ₦30k/month to handle the end-to-end process of producing and packaging the peanuts whenever we have orders from a supermarket. 

Whatever we make is returned to the business to pay the manager and other workers involved in production. The orders don’t come every month, and I have to pay the manager out of pocket most of the time, like I did in the last two months. I hope to give more attention to the business in 2025 and see how I can grow it.

Out of curiosity, does your unstable financial situation come with some anxiety?

Definitely. I get anxious, but I anticipated this as I was rounding up NYSC. I just make sure to always have food at home so I don’t add hunger to the pressure of not having a job. That way, I can keep a clear head and explore how to pursue my dreams and turn my business around.

I also have some money invested. Out of the ₦220k I made last month, I invested ₦110k in a friend’s cassava farm. I’m supposed to put in ₦350k, so I’ll spread the balance over the next few months. I expect to make a ₦245k profit added to my initial investment after harvest at the end of the year. 

So, when I feel bad about asking someone for ₦2k data like I did last night, I remember that I still have something to look forward to. I also have the bulk of my money invested into my business. It reminds me that while I don’t have money right now, I didn’t exactly waste it when I had it.

Right. Sounds like you’re not exactly job-hunting

I think about getting a job sometimes, but I want one that’ll give me time to pursue other interests and maybe explore a writing career. I don’t want to be stuck at a 9-5 that’ll keep me in a cycle. I’m not looking for a job just to survive.

I’ve turned down offers. The person I work with on solar installation projects offered me ₦100k/month to come work with him full-time, but I refused because I’d have to go everywhere with him and possibly work 24/7. I don’t want that. If I find a remote job that allows me flexibility and creative control of my time now, I’d definitely take it.

I notice you haven’t really mentioned your family, but you’re the firstborn. Do they have financial expectations of you?

My dad and I are not on great terms. Nothing serious; he just doesn’t know whether I’m surviving or not since I was in the polytechnic. My mum doesn’t ask me for money, but she put me through school. So, whenever I have money, I send her between ₦20k – ₦30k, or as I earn. For my siblings, I support them when I need to. I’m not under black tax pressure to handle anyone’s expenses.

Talking about expenses, what are your recurring monthly expenses like?

I buy food in bulk when money enters my account, so I don’t spend on food monthly. The only food items I buy outside bulk shopping are bread and the occasional pepper for stew.

How would you describe your relationship with money?

I’m quite self-sufficient, so it makes me plan my money right down to the last kobo. I don’t like begging or asking for salt from neighbours, so I think ahead for whatever I might need and plan accordingly.

I also like to invest. I know if I spend everything that comes to my hand, I’ll suffer for it soon. But by investing, I have something to look forward to. 

Is there something you want right now but can’t afford?

A washing machine. I’ve become very lazy to do my laundry. The last one I checked cost ₦177k, and I’ll probably get it next year from the proceeds of my cassava investment. 

How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1 – 10?

5. I don’t have all the money I need, but I’m content that I’ve utilised the opportunities I had to the best of my ability.

Find all the past Naira Life stories here.

We published 51 Naira Life stories in 2024, sharing important insights into how Nigerians navigate money. 

Before January 2025 arrives in a few days, we curated a list of the Naira Life stories from this year everyone should absolutely read. If you’ve read it before, read it again. It might give you added insight and the push to improve your relationship with money in 2025.

1. #NairaLife: She Endured Financial Abuse for 7 Years. Now She Earns ₦700k+/Month

This was my favourite Naira Life story this year, and I still remember the range of emotions I felt while interviewing the subject.

Her story is one of resilience. She talks about enduring financial (and physical) abuse in her marriage, eventually leaving with her two children and solely providing for them through several employment phases — from joblessness to juggling three jobs and then finding a ₦45k/month job. Thankfully, things are better for her now, and I hope things only go up from here.

2. #NairaLife: The 21-Year-Old Who Went From $5k in Debt to Multi-Business Owner in Two Years

Spoiler alert: After you finish reading this story, you’ll probably ask yourself if you’re doing the best you can.

The subject is a 21-year-old who thought he’d make it big trading crypto but ended up in a $5k debt and almost dropped out of school.

But that was in 2021. 

In three short years, he’s settled his debts, built a full-time career and created two businesses, all before graduation. How did he do it?

3. The #NairaLife of a 45-Year-Old Living Her Best Life Driving Cabs

It’s not every day you find a middle-aged woman behind a cab’s wheels in Lagos, but the woman in this #NairaLife is making it work. 

After losing her bank job in 2010, she started a fabrics and home decor business and tried several other hustles while raising her kids. She’s finally found stability with cabs, and with a >₦250k/week income, she doesn’t plan to stop soon.

4. The #NairaLife of a Baker Who’s Tired of Living on Handouts

This Naira Life was sad but also wildly relatable. From losing money to a romance scam to becoming homeless and surviving multiple depressive episodes, the subject has been through a lot

Her friends are the one constant in her life. They’ve always come through for her financially, but she’s at a point where she wishes she didn’t have to depend on them as much as she does.

5. The #NairaLife of a Corps Member Who’s Stripping to Pay Off Her Debt

This was yet another Naira Life that reminded readers how tough life gets. A series of unfortunate events pushed the corps member in this story into a cycle of debt, and she’s done many things to escape it, including stripping and bikini dancing. Her primary goal was to settle her debts so she could find work she actually wanted to do. 

Fun fact: Some readers reached out after this story was published and graciously cleared her debt. We love stories that end well!

6. The #NairaLife of a Pastor Navigating Guilt and a Marketing Career

Some background on this story: I was curious about pastors and how they make money, so I searched and searched until I found this man.

He’s a youth minister who also moonlights as a marketing professional, and while he’s done other regular jobs, he’s convinced his current marketing job is affecting his relationship with God. Why? You’ll have to read it to find out.

7. #NairaLife: What Does Navigating Infertility for Over a Decade Look Like?

Since I started writing Naira Life in 2023, I’ve wanted to speak to someone struggling with infertility. I’ve seen friends and family go through it and had an idea of how expensive it was. I also knew many Nigerians didn’t know how draining infertility can be on wallets, so I pursued the story. However, it was a different ball game convincing people to speak to me. I finally found a willing subject this year.

The subject has been trying to conceive for 13 years, and for Naira Life, she shared how her journey has changed her perspectives and affected her finances. Sending baby dust her way.

8. The #NairaLife of an Engineer Who Survived Homelessness and a ₦40m Debt

This Naira Life is the very definition of “Never give up.” In 2016, the 36-year-old subject made wrong investment choices, which led to losing his home and drowning in debt. He thought it was over, but his story changed again in less than a year, and he’s back chasing investments like the past few years didn’t happen.

9. #NairaLife: The Fear of Retrogression Cured Her Spending Problem

This was the first Naira Life story in 2024. I found it interesting how the subject’s spending habits changed completely from “laulau” spending to prudent saving. She also dropped a few gems about freelancing with foreign clients. You should read it.

10. The #Nairalife of a Couple Dating on Unstable Freelance Incomes

This Naira Life was one of the first couple #NairaLife editions we did to mark lovers’ month in February. I distinctly remember how cheesily in love these subjects were during the interview. 

They’re in a long-distance relationship, but that isn’t stopping them from working through their different spending habits and coming through for each other during bad financial periods because of their income instability as freelancers. God, when?

PS: We now have a flagship focused completely on exploring how money moves in relationships. It’s called Love Currency, and it’s published every Tuesday at 9 a.m. We’re currently closed for 2024 to resume in January, but you can read past editions here.

Find all the past Naira Life stories here.

But you still have to prepare for January’s 81 days of sapa, and that’s where these budgeting hacks come in.

“Have a separate expenses account” — Jade*, 26

I do this thing where I transfer the amount of money I can afford to spend per month in a separate spending account. After that, I freeze the bank app that contains my remaining funds, so I don’t take extra money when I finish my spending money. 

Sometimes, I even give my friend my ATM card to hide it so I’m not tempted. This hack has helped a lot this month. I’ve spent about half of my spending money. When it’s exhausted, I’ll continue my December enjoyment inside my house. 

“Go out with friends to split bills” — Nonye, 22

I made a list of all the fun places I want to try this month and shared it with my friend group so we can select the places we can visit and share the bills. 

For instance, we visited a Chinese restaurant on Christmas Eve, and after sharing the bill, my share only came to ₦25k. I’d have spent like ₦40k if I’d gone alone. Plus, I got to share out of everyone’s meals instead of spending so much on one meal without variety. We also split cab fares, and I paid only ₦7k instead of the ₦32k the cab charged.

“Jump danfo bus if need be” — Emma*, 26

Cab prices have been so high this period, so I’ve returned to my danfo roots. Imagine I spent only ₦1500 using danfo for a destination that a cab charged ₦27k for. It didn’t stop me from turning up when I arrived. So, take that danfo today. The means of transportation doesn’t matter, as long as you get there and have a good time.

“Consider activities that don’t involve spending money” — Kola*, 25

My partner and I are working with a strict budget this December, but it doesn’t mean we won’t have a good time. We intend to visit parks and take home-cooked food to turn ordinary outings into picnics. 

We also had an indoor movie night on Christmas Day. I moved the chairs, spread blankets on the floor, and made popcorn and fried chicken. The whole thing was free, but we created memories. Don’t let anyone pressure you to overspend this season. 

“Just improvise” — Ope, 27

I can’t afford to attend concerts this year because of extremely high ticket prices and transportation costs. So, I’m improvising. To usher in the holidays, I found a mad DJ mix on YouTube and blasted it all day at home. My neighbours even joined in, and it became like a mini house party. I plan to do the same thing on New Year’s Eve. Concert or no concert, I’m having a fantastic time.

*Some names have been changed for anonymity.

NEXT READ: 7 Nigerian Millennials Share Hacks for Living Through Inflation

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2024 was an interesting year for Nigerians living in Nigeria and spending the naira. Inflation hit all-time highs, and we had to continuously find creative ways to manage our money to meet the increasingly high cost of living.

Like we’ve done since 2019, we sought out Nigerians to share their financial journeys and look out for similarities and differences between how they’re making (or losing) money and how it affects their lives.

As the year comes to an end, let’s take a look back at the ten #NairaLife stories you loved the most and just couldn’t get enough of.

1. The #NairaLife of a Sex Worker Who’s Securing Her Siblings’ Future

“The 24-year-old in this story left home at 18 in search of a better life. She’s achieved that goal. Now, as her family’s breadwinner, her new focus is building an even better future for her siblings.”

I found her story fascinating. She’s focused on achieving financial freedom and doesn’t care that people judge her unconventional job; frankly, I respect it. 

2. #NairaLife: The Software Developer Picking Himself Up After Losing $500K in Seven Months

I screamed inwardly several times during this interview. The 41-year-old in this story has had a rollercoaster financial journey. He built considerable wealth over a 10-year career and was on his way to achieving his dreams of a second passport when he lost his life savings to a botched crypto project and cryptocurrency exchange in 2022.

He’s rebuilding his savings and investment portfolio now, but how can someone ever recover from a $500k loss?

3. #NairaLife: The Investment Analyst on Track to Grow Her Liquid Assets to ₦100m in Three Years

“This 30-year-old has found a steady career rhythm but feels like she lost precious years trying different paths, hoping one would stick. Now, her focus is clear: making up for lost time by obsessively growing her wealth. Her goal? ₦100m.”

This #NairaLife was a masterclass in growing wealth. And yes, I took personal notes. Who doesn’t want to grow wealth?

4. #NairaLife: This HR Babe Pays Black Tax Out of Goodwill

“She could have been a lawyer, but this 34-year-old HR specialist stuck to her guns and now takes home ₦2.5m a month. Her biggest struggles, though? Impulse spending and black tax obligations to a mum she feels doesn’t deserve it.”

Many of our readers related to her black tax dilemma: wanting to help your parents but also resenting having to spend so much on them. Unfortunately, black tax can be a lifelong responsibility.

5. The Conflicted #NairaLife of an Adult Content Creator With Financial Anxiety

“This 21-year-old stumbled into adult content creation after a series of unfortunate events. One month in, she’s earning more than she ever imagined — but she’s already crafting an exit plan for a future beyond the industry.”

This #NairaLife was both sad and a little inspiring. It was interesting to see how she’s picking herself up after life dealt her several bad hands. I hope she’s able to make good on those exit plans.

6. #NairaLife: The Researcher Who Had to Start Afresh After Getting Disowned

Before interviewing this subject, I thought disownment was a thing that mostly happened in Nollywood movies and was the only outcome of extreme situations when they occurred in reality. Imagine my shock when I heard that this subject’s dad disowned her at 24 for getting pregnant. 

She had to start afresh, but eight years later, she’s now a financially stable mother of two — thanks to her ₦1.5m/month salary. How did she get here, and what’s next for her?

7. #NairaLife: This Tech Bro Survived Two Layoffs by Working Multiple Jobs

The 28-year-old mobile engineer in this #NairaLife went through the nightmare of every 9-5er: He was laid off twice in seven months. Now, he’s navigating the insecurity that comes with working in the tech industry.

Thankfully, he’s had better luck in his relationship with money. He’s gone from careless spending to building an impressive $80k safety net by living below his means. Not bad at all.

8. #NairaLife: This Freelancer Once Drove Cabs. Now, She Makes $3k/Month

This 32-year-old freelance project coordinator is what you might call a late starter. Things haven’t always been rosy for her, from waiting five years to enter uni to driving cabs after a job loss.

However, she’s now on the road to financial freedom. Well, as soon as she figures out money management.

9. The #NairaLife of a Stay-at-Home Wife Who Isn’t Joking With Her Safety Nets

When asked if she’d ever return to the workforce, this 29-year-old stay-at-home wife responded, “What for?” I get it. She’s making just as much in the comfort of her home.

She doesn’t regret abandoning her career to start a family in 2020, but she’s now building something just as important: buffers and safety nets.

10. #NairaLife: She Earns Almost ₦2m/Month, but Is Considering Indefinite Unemployment

Following her big break in 2021, this 32-year-old sales manager’s income has been on an upward trajectory. The only problem? She’s now navigating burnout and thinks starting over might be the fix.

An excerpt: “I’ve worked nonstop since 2015, and it’s starting to catch up with me. Nowadays, I find myself increasingly disillusioned with the need to work and gather money. Like, is the point of my life to go from one meeting to the next trying to upsell people and pretend I’m passionate about one fintech product or the other?”

Find all the past Naira Life stories here.

How long have you been with your partner?

Samuel and I have been together for just about a year.

How did you meet him?

We met through a mutual friend. I joined some friends to film the “I’m not the celebrant, I’m the celebrant’s friend” TikTok video trend, and this mutual friend posted the video on her WhatsApp status. Samuel saw me in the video and DM’ed her to ask for my contact. She asked me, and I agreed. He reached out minutes after I gave my permission. 

We vibed well for the first couple of days, and then he said he’d like us to be together. I liked that we didn’t have to do a long talking stage. He knew what he wanted and went straight for it. I admired that, so we pretty much started dating. 

I should mention that we’d also met physically. He worked close to my house, so we’d arranged to see after work almost immediately after we started talking. It was a pretty smooth transition from the first meet-up to a relationship.

You mentioned work. What were your and Samuel’s financial situations like?

I was fresh out of uni, but fortunately, I learned digital skills while in school, which got me a remote social media gig. I was earning ₦50k/month, which wasn’t really enough to sustain me, but it was something. 

Samuel worked two jobs—one as a business development executive and another as a data analyst for a tech company. I knew he earned more than me, but we didn’t discuss his income, so I didn’t know his income bracket.

Tell me about the early days of your relationship

The early days were really sweet. I like going the extra mile for people I care about and buying them stuff, so I did that with Samuel. Three months into our relationship, his birthday came up— we share the same birth month, but mine comes before his—and I was determined to celebrate it. 

I’m not even that big on birthdays. In my previous relationship, my ex and I didn’t celebrate each other’s birthdays. But Samuel and I had several conversations, and he made it seem like he planned to go all out for my birthday. I didn’t want to be the person who gets so much on her birthday and gives little in return. So, I furiously gathered money to meet up.

At that point, I’d left that ₦50k job and was interning in a product management role, so I didn’t have a salary. But I still wanted to come through for Samuel.

I reached out to someone to make a customised sweatshirt and cargo shorts for him and paid in instalments. The whole thing cost me ₦30k, which was a lot for a jobless babe.

Wait first. How were you surviving without a salary? 

I was just managing. I had no savings and didn’t live with my parents, but my saving grace was my hairdressing skills. Although my income from hairdressing wasn’t regular, I was sure of finding a client at least twice a week. I also had an uncle abroad who occasionally sent me money. That’s how I survived.

Back to the gift: I finished paying the vendor just before my birthday, and I couldn’t even afford to get myself a gift. When my birthday came, Samuel got me a necklace, a pair of earrings, and a bracelet, which all cost less than ₦5k. You might think, “But that’s not bad.” I’m not a jewellery person, and he knew it. 

He had hyped up my birthday so much and had asked me several times what I wanted. I even gave him my best friend’s number so she’d help with gift options. He knew I loved perfumes, and he knew I wouldn’t use what he bought. I was so disappointed, but I didn’t complain. If he were intuitive, he’d have known my bland “thank you” lacked excitement, but he didn’t pay attention. That almost ruined my birthday. Thankfully, my uncle called and sent me money to go out.

Funny enough, when Samuel saw the pictures I took of that outing — I went with my friend — he got angry and asked why I didn’t take him instead. I was like, “But it’s not your money na?”

I’m screaming

That’s when I started paying attention to who he was financially and realised he’s actually quite stingy. I grew up with the mindset that it’s okay to share what I have with others without expecting anything in return. But Samuel only spends on people if he has something to gain from them. 

I wasn’t even billing him. It could be something as small as asking for ₦5k to sort something out, and he’d be like, “Why should I give you this money? What have you done to deserve it?” I never understood it. Did I have to do anything for him to assist me? Are we in a transactional relationship?

In addition to some other random gifts I gave him, I also assisted him with job interviews and written assessments. So, I didn’t understand his attitude. I stopped asking him for things and decided to hold back financially, too. 

Fortunately, my money problems reduced in April 2024. The company I interned at started paying me a ₦100k/month salary. By then, Samuel had lost one of his jobs, and I realised the one he had paid him ₦200k/month. But I didn’t even put my mind on his income because of what I’d come to know about his attitude to money.

I’m curious. Did you tell him about your issues with his habits?

Oh, I did. I brought it up for the first time in June. We had a face-to-face conversation, and I told him I thought he wasn’t doing so much, but he expected a lot from me. He went bonkers and made it sound like I felt entitled to his money. 

I wasn’t asking for a monthly salary; I was just trying to communicate that if he loved me, he’d sometimes give me money. He asked, “If I do it, would you even appreciate it?” In my head, I thought, “Bruh, do it first na. Should I thank you in advance?”

He apologised later, but there hasn’t been much improvement. Now he randomly sends me ₦1k – ₦2k, which has been more stifling than when he didn’t give me anything. I can’t ask for anything even if I wanted to because it’s like, shebi he’s giving me money.

One time in August, I had to travel for a job training, and we’d previously talked about going out when I returned. The money I expected from work hadn’t come in yet, and I needed something to tide me over. Samuel received some money from work around that time, so I jokingly asked him to give me money, but he refused. 

I suggested he give me part of what he budgeted for our plans so we wouldn’t go out again, but he refused and said I was entitled again. I told him it would have been better if he had offered to loan me the money so I’d know he cared. In the end, he just apologised again.

Hmmm

Another time, I wanted to buy a half-bag of rice and other foodstuffs to keep at home because my mum was visiting. Samuel was my contact with the person selling the foodstuff, so I sent him the money. It was about ₦90k, and it was all the money I had.

Samuel called back and said the price had increased by ₦5k. I asked if he could help me pay the extra ₦5k because I couldn’t afford it. His answer was an outright no. I eventually couldn’t buy that foodstuff. Samuel’s excuse was that, even if he had loaned me, there was a chance I wouldn’t pay back. I’ve only taken a loan from him once and cleared it in full, so I don’t know where that came from. 

Would you say his reluctance to part with money negatively affects your relationship?

It does. It definitely puts a strain on our relationship. I’m at a point where I’m seriously reconsidering the relationship. If we eventually get married and our children need things, would I be able to tell them to go meet their father? What if he starts asking them if they deserve things?

Samuel is good in other aspects, and we’re considering marriage, but this might be a dealbreaker. Money is very important. It’s different if he doesn’t have money. But he has it and isn’t willing to part with it. It’ll be a great disservice to me and my future children if I give them a father who isn’t willing to be financially capable or present in their lives.

I’m still waiting because I hope he changes. I’ve tried talking to him about it several times, and I hope he improves. If not, I might have to rethink my choices.

Is there a timeframe for when you want this improvement to happen before you walk out?

Three months. I’ll discuss things with him again this month, and I need to see changes in three months. If not, I walk.

Right. Do you guys do relationship activities like dates, though?

We hardly go on dates, which I don’t really mind because I’m a homebody. But I also like going out occasionally. When we do go out, he mostly pays. Other times, we stay indoors and play games. I don’t budget any amount on relationship expenses in a month because he doesn’t budget anything for me either. If he changes, I can start.

Imagine he changes, what’s your ideal financial future as a couple?

I’d like us to own land one day because I believe in real estate banking. If everything works out, I hope we can do that by next year.

Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.

*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.

NEXT READ: The Student Getting Emotionally Attached to a Transactional Relationship

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What’s your earliest memory of money?

One time, in 2000, our landlord came looking for my dad to ask for the house rent, and my dad told me to tell the landlord he wasn’t around. Guess what I said?

“My daddy said he’s not around?”

Worse. I told him my dad was inside. My Sunday school teacher had used one film about hell fire to traumatise me the week before, and I wasn’t about to go to hell for lying. The landlord disgraced my dad that day and said things like, “If you don’t have money, go and sleep under the bridge.”

I was 8 years old, and I concluded that not having money equalled turning into an agbero. Of course, my dad punished me too.

Of course. What was growing up like financially?

The rent incident opened my eyes to our financial situation: we were broke. My dad was a mechanic who didn’t make great money, so unpaid house rent and our landlord coming to shout were regular incidents. 

To make things worse, my dad had two wives and nine children, and we all lived in a two-bedroom flat. My mum was the younger wife whom he married because the first wife didn’t have a child. Ironically, the first wife started popping kids out the minute he married a second wife— children he didn’t have money to provide for. 

My mum was a tailor, and she pulled most of the financial weight for her children’s education. The only thing my dad did was drop ₦1k for food every three days. There were days when my mum would cook a pot of soup, feed the children and hide the remaining soup in her cupboard so my dad wouldn’t find and finish it. 

There were a lot of fights between my parents and the first wife. Even us children fought each other too. It was a toxic situation, and I didn’t like going home. After school, I hung out with my friends and ate at their houses or ran errands for their parents for ₦20 here and there.

Speaking of, when was the first time you made money?

I didn’t make any actual money until after I graduated from secondary school in 2008. I got a job teaching primary one students for ₦3500/month. During the weekends, I took serving and cleaning gigs at events for ₦1k – ₦3k. I was making money but didn’t feel the impact because my dad insisted I submit my income to him.

You say?

The man argued that I was living in his house and eating his food — which was actually my mum’s food — so I had to give him what I made. I initially refused, but my mum convinced me to give him the money for peace to reign.

This stopped when I moved out to go to uni in 2010. I didn’t get any allowance from home except for the foodstuff my mum managed to get me when I visited home. I survived by doing several things for money. 

I continued serving food at events and lived on the ₦5k it brought weekly in my first two years in school. Then, in my third year, I started selling sneakers. A friend introduced me to the business; all I had to do was show people the pictures of the sneakers, then buy the shoes after they paid and deliver to them. I made at least ₦3k in profit on every pair of sneakers sold.

Not bad

By final year in 2015, everyone in my department knew me as the guy who sold good sneakers. I could sell six sneakers and make up to ₦25k in profit in a week. I was handling my school expenses and feeding myself comfortably. I also started sending ₦10k to my mum when she complained about my dad not dropping money. 

The business dipped when I went for NYSC in 2016. Till today, I have little regrets about not working my service year to the same state I schooled in. That way, I’d have held on to my customers. Instead, I went to a northern state and served in a school. No one bought sneakers in the north.

The school paid ₦5k, and I got ₦19800 from the government. It felt like a downgrade. Me, who was balling on almost ₦100k monthly now had to manage ₦25k.

Would you say your quality of life also reduced with your income?

My reduced income just led to me cutting off certain excesses. Back in uni, I bought food every day and changed clothes when I liked. But during my service year, I remembered I knew how to cook. I didn’t like having to tell my mum I didn’t have money, but I didn’t have a choice.

I returned home in 2017 and got an operations role at a finance institution. My salary was only ₦80k/month, but I was really excited about it. I knew several people who struggled to get jobs after NYSC, and I’d just gotten one without stress. It felt good.

I was squatting with a friend when I started the job, but I planned to get my own space. I reasoned that if I saved half of my salary monthly, I could rent a decent room within a year. I ended up squatting with that friend for four years.

What happened?

My family happened. As soon as my mum learnt I was working, she started complaining about the situation at home, and I had no choice but to give her money. 

My dad started asking for money, too. I mostly ignored him, but then he’d complain to my mum and pick a fight with her, accusing her of turning his son against him. My mum, ever the peacemaker, would call me and beg and beg until I agreed to send money to my dad. 

When I made the mistake of visiting home, my half-siblings would descend on me for help too.  At one point, one of my half-siblings was in a federal university, and I was paying his school fees.

An outsider looking in would’ve assumed I was one rich man with the way I kept giving my family money. But I couldn’t stand hearing them complain if I could help. That’s where all my savings went during the three years I spent at the operations job. My eyes cleared in 2020.

Tell me about that

The lockdown happened, and my employers laid off non-essential staff. I fell into that category. I found myself jobless and with zero savings. 

My dad and siblings kept calling for help, and they never understood when I said I didn’t have money. When the calls became too much, I stopped taking them entirely. One day, my dad sent me a text message saying, “Thank you for refusing to help me, but remember I’m still your father. Your child will do the same for you.”

Ah

I was so angry. This was someone who was never there for me growing up. I didn’t hold on to that and had helped him financially several times. Just the one time I didn’t, he was swearing for me. 

It became a whole issue. I called him back, and it descended into a full-on shouting match. I told him never to call me again. My mum tried to intervene days later by summoning me to the house for a physical meeting so I could apologise to my dad. 

The physical meeting also became heated, and several of my half-siblings took my dad’s side and insulted me too. These were children I spent my money on and contributed to their school fees. I felt betrayed. I also concluded they had the audacity to talk to me the way they did because I’d stopped giving them money.

It was a wake-up call. There I was, bending myself backwards to help my family, but they saw me as an ATM card that had no value once there was no money in the account. I felt used.

Sigh. I can imagine

My friend was the only reason I didn’t starve or become depressed. He kept encouraging me and also convinced me to learn project management. He told me it was lucrative and I could get a remote job with it; that was all the encouragement I needed. 

I took a couple of free online courses and started putting “Project Manager” on my CV and LinkedIn like I had actual experience. Fortunately, an opportunity came in the middle of 2021: one of my former bosses at the finance institution helped me get back my operations job. I’d been pestering him to help me get back in, and I didn’t even think he took me seriously until I got the call to resume. 

This time, my salary was ₦100k/month. The money was a welcome change from months of relying on my friend’s kindness, but my primary goal was to get project management experience.

How did you do that?

I started shadowing the project managers on my team and asking them to give me some of their work. A lot of it was about monitoring compliance, risk management strategies and countless meetings.

Thankfully, I had an understanding manager who liked the work I was putting into gaining enough experience for a career switch. When a spot opened up in the project management team in 2023, she recommended me, and I got the role. My salary bumped up to ₦250k.

Whoosh. How did that feel?

It felt great. I’d actively pursued something and gotten it. The salary increase was also timely. I had moved into my own apartment in 202,1 and my landlord increased the rent from ₦350k to ₦500k/ year. Thankfully, the new role came around the same time.  

I also became more intentional with my finances, saving at least ₦30k/month. Since I realised how much my family drained me financially, I stopped checking on them. I haven’t even visited home since 2020. I can’t afford to go home because I know the billing and sad stories that await me if I try it. 

My dad still does his emotional blackmail, but I make sure to start every call with a made up narration of how I’m also suffering so I have an excuse when he inevitably asks for money. I don’t pick anyone else’s calls except my mum and her kids; I try to send her at least ₦30k/month. I know she probably gives some of her allowance to my dad, but that’s her business. As long as I’m not giving him anything other than random recharge cards and rice during festive seasons.

What are your finances like these days?

I got my current job in April — still a project manager, but my salary is now ₦400k/month.

I plan to get married next year and will need to move into a bigger apartment. So, I still live like I earn ₦250k so I can save ₦150k/month. I currently have about ₦950k in savings, but I’ll need double that if I want to achieve both goals to a reasonable extent. I’m starting to think aggressively saving alone won’t get me there, considering how terribly high the price of everything gets by the minute.

I’m also considering side gigs to increase my earnings. The same friend who introduced me to project management recently linked me to a remote job site for freelance and contract job opportunities. But I’ve been applying to jobs without much success. The one that seemed promising was going to pay $30/hour for a week, but my network during the interview was terrible, and they didn’t reach out afterward. I hope I find something soon.

I hope so too. Let’s talk about your typical monthly expenses

What’s one thing you want to be better at, concerning your finances?

I need to hack the making money bit. I’m not a big spender, but I had a really late start in my financial journey, and I haven’t made the best decisions. Maybe if I’d been more intentional with managing money, I’d have a bigger safety net and would even be able to consider investments like my mates are doing.

Right now, I can’t afford to tie money down because I’ll need it in the near future. Maybe after that’s settled, I can start researching investment options like stocks and crypto. 

I’m curious. What’s an ideal income range for you?

I’d say ₦800k/month for my current professional level. However, I know I’m still a junior level project manager, so that may not be possible yet. But I intend to keep upskilling and applying to more opportunities. I believe it’s only a matter of time before my earnings match that amount.

What’s one thing you want right now but can’t afford?

A car. I work from the office only twice a week, and I’ve been toying with the idea of driving cabs whenever I’m free. If I had my own car, I could do that on my own time and park somewhere if I had meetings. Plus, it’d help me with mobility. Anyway, that’s just a wish. A good car costs at least ₦5m now, and I don’t have anything up to that.

How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?

6. I feel like I wasted so much time trying to save my family and sometimes, it feels like I’ll never get that lost time back. It’s my biggest regret.

Find all the past Naira Life stories here.

How long have you been with your partner?

We’ve been seeing each other for a year. However, it’s not exactly a relationship; she’s married, and we’re on the low.

Tell me more about that

Mutiat is a staff member at my uni, so I can’t reveal exactly how we met. But we became close after I had to regularly visit her office to help with her work. She’s 12 years older than me, but she’s something of a Gen Z at heart.

When we started talking, I noticed just how in tune she was with pop culture. She knows everyone from Fireboy DML to Burna Boy. She’s even the biggest fan of the latter. I found that really surprising because she has a gentle outward appearance and is always covered because of her religion.

How did you both become an item?

We began chatting regularly not long after I started going to her office. At first, it was harmless. I’d send her Twitter links of people arguing about their music faves or a post about Burna Boy misbehaving, and we’d argue and joke about it.

Then we started chatting into the night, and somehow, sexting entered the picture. I mentioned earlier that she’s married. She told me her husband had multiple wives and girlfriends and was hardly around. In summary, she was sexually frustrated. I already liked her, so I was happy to agree to a primarily sexual relationship when she suggested it.

What does a primarily sexual relationship entail?

Our relationship can’t be more than sex. I don’t text her anyhow, and we don’t talk to each other in public. I’ve even stopped going to her office to prevent suspicion. She decides where and when we meet.

I also wouldn’t call what we have entirely transactional because she doesn’t pay me for sex. Yes, she pays for the hotels, buys me things and has bailed me out more than once after I exhausted the ₦60k allowance from my parents. But I don’t demand or expect it. I like her as a person, and I honestly look forward to spending time with her. But I also know our arrangement can’t be more than this.

You mentioned she buys you things. What things?

Mostly food when we meet up. She also bought me a pair of shoes and perfume for my birthday. Sometimes, when I complain about school to her, she sends me ₦10k or ₦20k. That happens about once a month.

I bought her a ₦2k pair of earrings once. I’m not even sure why I did. I just saw the earrings and liked them. I thought they’d look cute on her, but she didn’t accept it. 

Oh. Why?

She said it was very different from her regular jewellery choices, and her husband would know she didn’t buy it herself.

To be honest, I felt really pained. I wondered if it wasn’t the same husband she claims never has time for her. How come he’ll suddenly pay attention to her earrings? I’d used the last ₦2k in my account to buy those earrings, but I didn’t tell her that.

I understand her, though. She can’t afford to let her husband suspect anything, and we already agreed it’s just sex. I haven’t tried to buy her anything since then. The only thing I do for her is help with her work and offer a listening ear when she wants to rant about music or whatever stunt her co-wives are pulling. I’m glad I can help her to an extent, I guess.

It lowkey sounds like you want more from the relationship than just sex

Damn. Is it that obvious? Actually, yes. Sometimes, I fantasise about us going on a date together, attending a concert, or even having her picture on my phone. That’s another thing. Mutiat regularly goes through my phone to make sure I don’t have pictures of her. I know she’s just being careful to avoid blackmail or revenge porn, but it almost feels like what we have isn’t real.

I know it’s not “real” in the true sense, but we’re also friends. We like the same things, and we talk. Sometimes, it feels like she’s actively erasing herself from my life so she can disappear whenever she needs to.

Would you say you’re prepared for this possibility?

Somehow. Regardless of how I feel, if she says she’s tired today, I have to accept it. No one sent me to go and catch feelings. People are getting sugar mummies and changing their lives. Me, I’m getting attached. 

I’m screaming. What happens when you graduate from uni?

I honestly don’t know yet. She once joked about helping me work my NYSC so I’d stay back in the city we live, but I’m not putting my mind to it.

I told my guy about us, and he wants me to get her to set me up financially. He thinks she’s just using me, so I should also get something substantial out of it. I somehow agree.

Oh. How do you intend to do that?

I recently started taking software development classes, but my laptop is old and useless. I’ve mentioned to Mutiat that I need a new laptop, and I think I need to apply pressure. Maybe I’ll just tell her outright and see what she says. If she refuses, I might just end the arrangement. If it’s not benefiting me, maybe I should save myself the heartbreak and leave before I fully catch feelings.

Hmm. What if she agrees?

Then we’ll continue until she decides she doesn’t want what we have anymore. But I’ll make sure I become intentional about asking for financial help when I need it. At least, I’ll have something I can point to as what I got from her.

I’m curious. Does your arrangement with Mutiat allow you to have a regular partner?

We haven’t discussed it, but I assume it shouldn’t. I’ve not even seen anyone I want to date, so it’s not really a problem. We’ll cross that bridge if we get there. 

What’s an ideal future for you and Mutiat?

For her to leave her husband and follow me. LOL. I’m just kidding. There’s no future for us. 

Interested in talking about how money moves in your relationship? If yes, click here.

*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.

NEXT READ: The Content Writer Navigating an Expensive Open Relationship With ₦250k/Month

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When did you first realise the importance of money?

That was in JSS 1, and I’d just moved back in with my dad. I’d previously lived with my aunt and didn’t lack anything with her. There was food at home, and she gave me ₦50 to school daily, too. 

But we struggled to eat or do other basic things at my dad’s. The ₦50 reduced to ₦20, then the ₦20 stopped coming. It made me hyper-aware of what a lack of money could do.

Why were you living with your aunt?

My mum passed away when I was four, and my dad shipped me off to live with my aunt. He was a builder who had periods of plenty money and then no money at all. I think my mum was the one who managed his money when she was alive. When she passed, he started blowing money on alcohol, cigarettes and whatever else he wanted.

My aunt often complained about my dad not sending money for my care when I lived with her. It was when I went back to live with him that I saw the extent of the situation. It’s safe to say I saw shege. I wouldn’t eat all day and developed an ulcer in less than a year. At some point, I used firewood to cook.

I couldn’t even buy detergent to wash my school uniform, and people stared pitifully because I wore dirty clothes. I had to start boiling my uniforms in water so they’d look a bit presentable. But that made them look rough and wear out quickly. I also owed school fees a lot. It was all embarrassing. 

I was likely traumatised too, because I went back to live with my aunt for a year and ate so much I became obese. When I returned to live with my dad again in JSS 3, I began thinking about ways to make money because the financial situation was still terrible. 

I’m sorry you went through all that. Did you find a way to make money?

Yeah, I started a reading club in school. My aunt introduced me to novels when I lived with her, and I had quite a number of them — mostly romance. I was also part of a VIP system at a bookstore where I got free access to even more novels.

So, I started renting them out to schoolmates for ₦10 – ₦20 per book. I also sold sweets and made at least ₦600 weekly from both businesses. I did that until SS 1 and stopped after someone reported me to the school authorities.

It’s giving bad belle

Right? I didn’t do anything else for money until I finished secondary school in 2012. Then, I got a job at a school teaching the primary three and four classes. My salary was only ₦6k, but they owed the first month and delayed payment in the second month. 

One of the school teachers hired me to coach her child for after-school lessons, but she found it difficult to pay the ₦4k/month we agreed on. After three months, I left the job and moved on to another school that paid ₦15k/month.

The new school also owed salaries, but I stuck with them longer because I had about four students whose parents paid me ₦2k/month for extra lessons. In a good month, my total income was around ₦20k. I was balling.

Tell me about that

I mostly spent my money on food. Whenever my dad had money, he bought a bag of rice, garri, palm oil and dry pepper. The only way I could eat something more interesting was if I bought it myself.

I stayed at the school for over a year and left after they owed three months’ salary at a stretch. My next job was as a sales girl for a woman who sold groceries. My salary was ₦10k, but we agreed she would hold ₦6k for me and only pay me ₦4k monthly.

Why?

I was about to write GCE and JAMB — WAEC banned my result for some reason — and I needed money for the forms and textbooks, as well as to process uni admission. Also, I trusted the person who introduced me to her, so I knew my money was safe. 

I got the GCE and JAMB forms for about ₦30k. My elder sister also pitched in even though she was sponsoring herself through school. I couldn’t afford hostel accommodation when I got to uni in 2015, and I spent the first few weeks commuting from my house to school. Even that one sef, I had to beg my sister for the ₦1k daily transport fare. 

I realised that wasn’t sustainable, so I started sleeping in class instead. That didn’t last a month because a guy I was reading with in class decided to feel me up while I slept. 

Yikes. Sorry about that

It was such a nasty experience. Fortunately, a friend called me around the same time the incident happened and noticed I wasn’t fine. He pressed to know what happened, and I shared my accommodation issue. He sent ₦40k, and I used the money to secure a hostel. He even sent me extra for food later. It was just miraculous timing.

How about your dad? Was he supporting you?

My dad was drunk the whole time I was in uni and didn’t even know when I graduated. I survived in uni by doing a bunch of things.

In year one, I sold puff-puff with my hostel roommate. We pulled money together and I woke up at 4:30 a.m. to mix the dough and fry it before class, while my roommate sold them in school for ₦5 apiece. We did that for less than a semester and made ₦15k in profit before everything scattered.

How did it scatter?

We agreed that I’d keep all our earnings, put it back in the business and wait until the end of the semester to share the money. But she started crying to our other roommates that I’d stolen her money. I was so pissed that I gave her the whole profit and buckets and every other item we’d bought for the business. 

After I gave her everything, I remembered I was broke and didn’t have a dime. I lost so much weight because I wasn’t eating. My dad also fell sick, and we had to sell some of his properties to pay his hospital bills.

Fortunately, I met someone in church who took on a spiritual mother role over me. She learned about my situation and was like, “You’re industrious, but you don’t like asking for money.” She eventually loaned me ₦10k, and when I resumed school for year two, I used it to start a supermarket in my room. I sold everything you can think of in that room — from spaghetti to tomatoes. 

Was it profitable?

I was a big girl. Gas cookers and stoves were contraband in the hostel, but I bribed the porters to keep one. I cooked soups and ate well. I did very well.

But I fell sick at the end of the year and had to go home. When I returned, my roommate had started selling the same exact things. I didn’t even confront her. I just quietly stopped my own business.

I’d saved up to ₦60k, so I got two other roommates to rent an off-campus room. From there, I started my next hustle as a house agent. I can’t even remember how I got into it; I just did.

How did pay work as an agent?

I reposted room-to-let ads from other agents on my WhatsApp status, and I made at least ₦4k on every person who asked to inspect the house. But I trekked so much during that period, taking people from house to house. I also got a small percentage of the agent fee if they eventually rented the house.

Around 2018, a bike-hailing company launched in Nigeria, and I landed an activation gig with them. My job was to go around telling people about the app and convincing them to download it with my activation code. At first, I made around ₦300 per download, but the company kept reducing the bonus until it was about ₦150.

I moved on to their competitors in 2019, and those ones paid between ₦350 – ₦400 per download. I was still doing the house agent thing, and my income from all the hustles came to ₦40k – ₦80k monthly. 

The only downside was that I wasn’t saving a lot. I was pretty much eating whatever I wanted, spoiling myself, and even buying a phone.

To be fair, though, my project took a lot of my money. My supervisor only reviewed printed work, and I had to constantly reprint to reflect the corrections. Anyway, I graduated from university in 2019.

Yay. What did you do next?

I had the brief panic feeling most people get when they finish uni: What do I do next? How do I survive? 

So, I applied to jobs everywhere. I even fell for one of those network marketing scams where they gather job applicants and “train” them to become their own bosses. I moved back in with my dad because my apartment had flooding issues. That turned out to be a mistake.

My dad was the kind of person who attributed one’s worth to money. He saw me sitting at home as lazy. On several occasions, he sent me to buy him drugs, and when I asked for transport fare, he said, “Why can’t you trek? What are you doing with your strength anyway? Are you making any impact on society?”

Hmmm

I knew I couldn’t stay home. One day, I walked into a random real estate company and told them I wanted to work. They insisted they weren’t hiring, but I was like, “Don’t worry. Don’t hire me. I’ll just stay here and assist the receptionist.”

That’s how I started hanging around assisting everyone and tagging along whenever they went for site inspections. After some of those inspections, they’d give me ₦4k for transport. The random stipends came weeks apart, so my income was very irregular. But I made sure to be as useful as possible so they wouldn’t think, “What’s the point of keeping this person around?”

A few months later, my spiritual mother introduced me to someone who worked at a mall. They put me in the accounting department, but I did everything from supervising the kitchen to handling the books. My salary was ₦70k/month. This was in January 2020.

Then the lockdown happened, and I had to stop working.

Phew. What did you do with the free time?

I had started learning Excel at the job because I wanted to make myself useful. So, when the lockdown happened, I decided to start offering online “How to do accounting for your business” training sessions on WhatsApp. 

I taught small business owners and vendors how to determine the selling price for their business, calculate profit, etc. I charged ₦5k, but I mostly sold the training at a ₦2k early bird price. I know I made ₦20k one time after posting excessively on my WhatsApp.

I also did some dropshipping—mostly gym shoes—on the side, but my main income source during the lockdown was the training sessions. My then-boyfriend (now my husband) encouraged me to learn data analysis since I knew a few things about Excel. So, I took a course on Udemy, which helped me get my next job at an e-commerce company. This time, my salary was ₦60k/month.

My dad also passed away at the end of 2020, and several people gave me and my sister money to help with the funeral. In the end, we had about ₦120k left after we buried him, so we used it to rent an apartment.

Sorry about your dad

Thank you. The new apartment was closer to my job, which reduced my transportation costs. I spent two years at the company, and during that time, I did so many certifications I thought my head would spin. 

By the time I left in 2022, my salary had only increased to ₦80k, but my data analysis skills had more than tripled. I’d also started a perfume oil business at some point while employed there and made at least ₦30k/month in profits.

After I resigned, I decided to register for NYSC and get it over with. I took 150 pieces of my ₦1k perfume oil to orientation camp and sold it all in less than three weeks. That was possible because the camp soldiers seized everyone’s big perfume bottles as contraband. My oil bottles were tiny, so they allowed me to take them in. You won’t believe I spent the entire ₦150k I made in camp.

You say?

The lure of the mammy market worked its magic. I was just buying shawarma, grilled fish, grilled chicken, you name it.

Post-camp, my Place of Primary Assignment (PPA) was a tech company — I got the connection through a friend — and my official role was customer success intern. It was a bit weird to be at intern level, considering all my years of work experience, but that was the only role the company had for corps members. They paid ₦50k/month, and with the NYSC stipend, my income was ₦83k/month. The company retained me after I finished my service in 2023, and I got a salary bump to ₦150k. Later that year, after people complained, they reviewed salaries, and I got another bump to ₦250k. But my eyes were already on bigger things. 

Customer success is heavily data-reliant, and as the only data analyst on the team, I was doing my normal customer success manager work and data analysis for the entire team. I knew I could get better opportunities. So, I began applying all I’d learnt on the job, talking to people about customer success and putting myself out there on LinkedIn.

Did job offers come?

Oh, they did. I was even selecting the ones I wanted. At that point, I worked mostly remotely — only one day at the office —but most Nigerian companies wanted a hybrid situation where employees would work from the office thrice a week. I didn’t want that, so I set my sights on foreign companies. 

I eventually landed a customer success manager role with a Ghanaian company early this year. That’s my current role. But I really shot myself in the foot when negotiating my salary.

Ooof. You didn’t ask for enough?

I asked for less than they offered. They gave me a ₦400k – ₦800k range for the role, and I went and picked ₦650k because I was scared of picking the highest. 

Only for me to enter the company and realise that other people picked the highest figure and even negotiated to like ₦900k or ₦1m. It’s painful, but I’m trying to work up the courage to ask for a raise.

I also run two businesses. One is with my husband — we got married last year — and it’s a virtual tutoring company where we teach people coding, maths and English. My role is admin-related: I sort out the students, assign them to tutors, handle payments and the rest. I get 17% of the profits monthly, and right now, that’s about ₦200k/month. 

The second business is a CV-writing service, and I have a virtual assistant who helps me with the social media page and anything else I want to do outside work. I pay the assistant ₦50k and get an average of ₦50k/month in profit.

All together, my monthly income is at least ₦900k. 

What kind of life does ₦900k/month afford you?

I still feel broke. If someone had told younger me that I’d be earning almost a  million and still have to calculate so much before doing things, or not be able to do some things at all, I’d have said it was impossible.

I bought a $300 course recently and I had to save for a few months to afford it. I also want to buy a laptop, but do you know how much that costs now? I feel like I shouldn’t be calculating as much as I do, or thinking about starting a business for extra income. ₦900k should make my life easier, but it doesn’t.

Is there an ideal amount you think would help?

The starting point is earning in dollars. I don’t even mind earning $1k and going up from there. I don’t want to earn in naira anymore. 

When I got my job, ₦650k was about $600, but now it’s not up to $400. What happens next year? Will it be $200? What happens when I need to pay for another course? There are several courses I can’t do yet because I have to plan and plan.

I recently got a $2k – $3k offer, though. But the company has several red flags on Glassdoor. I’m currently contemplating if I should sacrifice my mental health for money.

I’m screaming. Let’s break down your monthly expenses

These are my recurring expenses. I often spend more than this, but it depends on the month. For instance, I’m currently renovating my kitchen, and I’ve spent about ₦600k. Sometimes, I contribute to the home’s expenses, but that’s only when I want to assist my husband; he pays for everything.

I regularly take a lot of courses, but there’s no set monthly budget for that. My last course was a two-level professional certification for customer success managers, and I paid over $300 for each level. For savings, I invest my money in stocks.

How much is your stocks portfolio worth now?

It’s a little below $1k now, but it fluctuates regularly because of the stock market and exchange rate. I’m not worried about it, though. The plan is to just forget the money there and let it grow.

I should mention I recently started a master’s degree program, so that’s another thing taking my money. My husband paid the ₦300k registration fee, but I handled the almost ₦400k payment for my first semester.

What part of your finances do you think you could be better at?

I can definitely do better at saving money. ₦100k monthly is pretty small, considering my income and limited responsibilities. But I also don’t want to be the person who aggressively saves and doesn’t enjoy their money in the present. 

Is there anything you want right now but can’t afford?

An international MBA. I’ve noticed recruiters for global companies want to see that talents have gone past their immediate environment to gain international experience. I’ve seen relatively cheap MBA options I can do with $300/month, but it’s still expensive because I earn in naira.

Secondly, I’d like to be able to relocate someday. But before this happens, I want to visit these countries and see what they’re like before uprooting my life. I can’t do any of those yet because my income is still too low, but hopefully, that’ll happen soon. 

How would you rate your financial happiness on a scale of 1-10?

7 or 8. I’m not where I want to be, but it’s a huge improvement from where I was. It’s like, I know I’m not squandering money, but I also feel like I’m not saving enough. 

Find all the past Naira Life stories here.